*Extracted from the "About" page of RonnieBricksHateForHire.com

My second-grade teacher—may she rot—told us on the first day of class that God gave everyone a gift, and that it was a teacher's job to help unearth it. Well she did her job with me, because I hated that fluffy bullshit and I've been hating ever since. My moms, my friends, rich people, poor people—I hate all that shit. Sports, movies, television—I hate the mother-hating Jesus Christing crap out of that stuff.

In college, my boy Beef Jersey—who I haven't spoken to since what he pulled at the beach—made me a suggestion that I didn't hate. He said: "Ronnie Brick, man. You hate so toughly, and so cleanly, you oughta get paid for that shit."

"You're retarded Jersey," is what I said at the time, but I remembered his words. In 2003, I made them a reality with the launch of this website, www.RonnieBricksHateForHire.com.

Since that time, I've been doing what you don't have either the time, the energy, or the conviction to do yourself, and hating your enemies for you. I will also hate your loved ones, if necessary. I offer customizable packages for every budget and situation. Whether your needs are conceptual—my general bad-will program—or tangible (such as my hate mail and angry phone message plan) I'm confident Ronnie Brick's Hate for Hire has something for you.

I invite you to navigate around the site and browse my options, then get in touch by clicking Contact, and we'll work something out. You're a douchebag if you don't.

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